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DIE YOU ZOMBIE BASTARDS! (2005)

Written by: Greigh Johanson.

Die You zombie Bastard! is a film based on director Caleb Emerson's previous short film "Red Breakfast III" from 1998. You with multiple personalities will definitely love this movie for what it has to offer: a content of archaeological college girls who turns into zombie-slaves - A love story and a mishmash of more's of other film genres that never quite manages to intertwine into something logical.





Red Toole has found happiness with his wife and accomplice Violet. They are cannibalistic serial killers and probably would have lived happily today if not the evil Baron Nefarious was on the go. From his secret laboratory somewhere in the Bermuda Triangle, the mad scientist decides to enslave the world, but first he will kidnap the woman in Reds dreams. Fortunately, Red initiates a career as a superhero and embarks on a long and arduous journey to find his sweetheart - and saves the world.

This is a parody and homage to B-movie. Naked young women is an important part, as well as sexual allusions of all kinds. The filmmakers have done their utmost to try to make the film so extremely silly as possible, which means a cavalcade of abnormally large penises, as absurd gore effects and large amounts of blood. The film has much more in common with older movies on the theme of zombies than we have to be associated with in today's zombie world. The result remains that women are transformed into spineless slaves into a zombie masters, but here's the hero and heroine who are the real meat-eaters!

What I like most about the film is the soundtrack that manages to perfectly match the film's atmosphere. The whole movie feels like a colorful comicbook with the help of the notes to Rockabilly, Surf, Punk and Metal. But it's also that it successfully manages to avoid attaching themselves in a category that makes it unique in its own way.

It's crazy and goes over the limit for what you can joke about and my suspicion is that not everyone will appreciate it. The actors play their roles of conscious and the film's qualities and defects need not be analyzed because it's a deliberately bad movie. Almost all roles are unabashedly outdated, as old as the completely absurd dialogue is poorly written. The special effects, like the props are made at such cheap production that even a certain craftsmanship still shines through the bloody surface.

If you overall success enjoy this movie, then you need to at least have a high tolerance of extreme stupidity. If so, then there shall not be any problems that fall under the influence of the film's bizarre charm. This is a particular kind of cheesy movie that offers characters who Coconut Head Face-Man, a Jason-caricature killer with a coconut head face.

I don't recommend this film to any zombie-fanatics at all, you'd probably be disappointed. I recommend this movie to everyone who appreciates brain damaged low-budget entertainment without any restrictions. Meet cannibalistic serial killer-superheros who eat their enemies!

Rating: 3 out of 5.





Directed by: Caleb Emerson
Written by: Haig Demarjian, Caleb Emerson
Produced by: Jarred Alterman, Robert Busher, Ken Cmar,
Haig Demarjian, Caleb Emerson, Leland T. Hart, Anna Snyder

Cinematography by: Jarred Alterman
Editing by: Daniel Strange
Special Effects by: Jason Asselin, Warren Benett, Caleb Emerson
Music by: Christopher Beal, Paul Leary, Tony Milano, Smokey Miles, Ian Ross
Cast: Tim Gerstmar, Geoff Mosher, Pippi Zornoza, Jamie Gillis,
Hasil Adkins, Jennifer K. Beal, Sadie Blades, Zhana LaRenard,
Joe James, Sandra Kennedy, Lon E. Plynton, Barundeb Duttah, Doug Williams.

Year: 2005
Country: USA
Language: English 
Color: Color
Runtime: 1h 37min

Distributor: Zombastic Productions Inc.

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